Reviews -- Peculiar People: Mormons and Same-Sex Orientation



	Peculiar People: Mormons and Same-Sex Orientation

Salt Lake Tribune, Peggy Fletcher Stack
Homosexual Mormons are trying to determine whether they can stay with integrity in a church that declares homosexual behavior to be sinful.

Church policy requires that a disciplinary council be called to consider excommunication for a practicing homosexual. However, church spokesman Don LeFevre said that "compassion and understanding toward those with homosexual challenges is encouraged."

The problems they face are described in a new book, Peculiar People: Mormons and Same-Sex Orientation, published by Signature Books LLC., a publishing house that issues books challenging official position of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

"Homosexuality touches the lives of far more Latter-day Saints than is generally recognized," editors Ron Schow, Wayne Schow and Marybeth Raynes write in an introduction. Using statistical projections based on percentages of homosexuals in the general population, they theorize that there may be 800,000 homosexual Mormons in the 8 million-member church.

"Most of the writers are trying to stay in the LDS Church," said Ron Priddis of Signature Books.

Whether they will be able to is open to doubt. Last month the three top officials who make up the church's First Presidency issued a letter to congregations that specifically said that homosexual and lesbian behavior is sinful.

According to the letter to congregations, "The Lord's standard of moral conduct is abstinence outside of lawful marriage and fidelity within marriage." The letter was issued by Ezra Taft Benson, Gordon Hinckley and Thomas Monson.

According to LeFevre, the church believes that it is possible for homosexuals to change their sexual orientation. "Many individuals have discontinued homosexual behavior," he said. "To deny the possibility of change is to deny one's ability to choose for oneself."

In contrast, homosexual-rights groups like Evangelicals Concerned in New York maintain that in virtually all cases in which homosexuals claim to have changed their orientation they have either become celibate or returned to homosexual behavior after a period of time.

Daily Utah Chronicle, Tamara C. Williams
For anyone struggling between the dichotomy of their homosexuality and Mormon belief, the homosexuality of a loved one and your Mormon belief or the homosexuality of a Mormon friend, Peculiar People: Mormons and Same-Sex Orientation provides an oftentimes brutally honest exploration of these delicate issues.

Although Peculiar People does not offer the definitive explanation to the problems with homosexuality and Mormonism (which, had it attempted to do so, would greatly diminish the quality of the book), it does explore the human side to a very human issue and conversely, it examines Mormon doctrine and the scientific viewpoint.

Schow, Schow and Raynes brought together a variety of perspectives for their book. "They sought not merely a scientific view," observes former LDS Institute of Religion Director Lowell Bennion in their foreword, "but especially a human perspective—how Mormon homosexuals feel about themselves, how they get along with their families and associates both in the church and society."

The book is sectioned into a logical order. The first chapter on personal perspectives is divided into "Gay and Lesbian Voices," "Partners' Voices," and "Voices of Family Members and Friend." I believe the first chapter is the heart of the book. It contains the most emotional accounts of lesbian and gay Mormons' experiences in dealing with the contradiction between their sexual orientation and Mormon indoctrination.

Many of the personal accounts are quite shocking. As a nonMormon, I can't believe the amount of courage it must take for a Mormon homosexual to actually admit their homosexuality to their family, let alone their Mormon friends or the church. The church's treatment of homosexuality and homosexuals as the devil's spawns was quite enlightening.

Much of the stigma and misunderstanding of homosexuality was perpetuated by Spencer W. Kimball's The Miracle of Forgiveness, which states homosexuality is "an ugly sin... repugnant... embarrassing... perversion... sin of the ages... degenerate... revolting... abominable and detestable crime against nature... carnal...unnatural...wrong in the sight of god...deep, dark sin." I am relieved to know that the Mormon church is making strides to understand the physiology and psychology behind homosexuality.

Chapter Two of Peculiar People includes many different viewpoints, from scholars and doctors alike, on the empirical evidence for homosexuality, the Mormon homosexual adolescent development, therapy approaches, suicidal behavior in gay and lesbian Mormons, homophobia and many other aspects of the issues.

"Homosexuality touches the lives of far more Latter-day Saints than is generally recognized," assert the editors. "Assuming [national norms] there are 800,000 homosexual Mormons worldwide. Each has parents, grandparents, siblings, aunts, uncles, sometimes a spouse, sometimes children."

As Peculiar People shows, homosexual people are our brothers and sisters, our sons and daughters, our mothers and fathers and our husbands and wives. Homosexuality is a reality that needs to be dealt with by not only the Mormon Church, but also society at large.

I strongly recommend this book to any person interested in the facts behind homosexuality and to any person blind to this issue, especially Mormons and the rest of the homophobic world. Education is the first step toward understanding and acceptance.

St. George Spectrum, Carolyn Wardle
Peculiar People: Mormons and Same-Sex Orientation is a book dedicated to promoting understanding of the homosexual experience in LDS culture and provides incredible insight into the lives of those touched by this experience. It combines the scientific and psychological knowledge of our day with personal accounts of individuals struggling to come to terms with homosexuality.

My first reaction when I was handed Peculiar People: Mormons And Same-Sex Orientation was to roll my eyes in annoyance that the mosquito of homosexual behavior was buzzing around again. Accepting homosexual love with the same validity as heterosexual love has been a difficult concept for me to reconcile.

I had known several gay people in another city where I lived and was impressed with their kind, sensitive and loving natures. However, I felt their lifestyle was very self-centered and the quest for new partners immature.

Nevertheless, I took the book home and out of curiosity started to read. What I found was a personal and sensitive look at homosexuality in the LDS culture and religion. Entries were from homosexuals, partners of homosexuals, parents, church leaders, and psychologists. All trying to understand why a certain number of people are attracted to members of the same sex.

One was allowed to see the inner soul of people affected. Mothers, fathers, wives, husbands, and siblings shared the trauma associated with discovering a loved one is homosexual.

Jan Cameron wrote, "I did not choose to be a mother of a homosexual and I don't have the answers even after years of dealing with this issue. However I now find that it has been an enlightening experience and I consider myself a pioneer in sometimes uncharted waters from trying to assist other LDS parents who are out there floundering in the murky waves of dealing with homosexuality."

Gays and lesbians also shared their efforts first to change and then to accept the love themselves in a culture which says they are sinful. "I must say that I will be eternally grateful for my wife. I regret having caused her pain and am sure that I will be eternally repentant of that fact. However, I do not regret having been married and having had four children...I have always loved the church and the gospel of Jesus Christ and I continue to do so today."

Most books and articles have a specific point they wish to convey. The author gathers facts, authorities, and statistics to prove his conclusion. Peculiar People: Mormons and Same-Sex Orientation is unusual because its only objective is to bring understanding.

The book approaches the subject of homosexuality from all angles and viewpoints. Some feel homosexuality should not be considered a sin. They feel and individual's sexuality should be accepted and practiced within the same guidelines set for heterosexuals. Others feel homosexuals should remain celibate.

All, however, described the terrible price in self-esteem and emotional pain exacted from the lack of knowledge and understanding found in the LDS religion.

One contributor to the book wrote, "I did not indulge myself in fantasies, but struggled against them. I did not yield to these temptations or foster this appetite. When a particular episode was over, I was racked with depression and guilt so extreme that I became suicidal."

Joseph Smith said, "While one portion of the human race is judging and condemning the other without mercy, the Great Parent of the universe looks upon the whole of the human family with a fatherly care and paternal regard. He is a wise Lawgiver, and will judge all men, not according to the narrow, contracted notions of men, but according to the deeds done in the body, whether they be good or evil."

Lambda Book Report, Rev. Larry Uhrig
Mormon's have used the phrase "Peculiar People" to describe themselves, much as the ancient Hebrews did to denote their special relationship with God. This description aptly fits my experience of the Latter Day Saints. As a religious person and a gay activist for the past two decades I have viewed Mormons from a distance. Mormon history and doctrine has been so resolutely heterosexual and family-oriented that gay and lesbian Mormons have been less than visible in the church.

Peculiar People: Mormons and Same-Sex Orientation breaks the long silence of gay Mormons and sheds light upon their experiences. Through this series of first-person accounts, gay and lesbian Mormons speak of the deepest spiritual struggle, the pain of accommodation to church law, and the denial of the self. They speak to the struggle of all gay people and yet in doing so reveal the truth of an oppressive patriarchy which has for decades gripped the Mormons in fear and ignorance regarding human sexuality and Biblical truth. These voices, along with the voices of family and friends, serve to disclose the truth. At last, there is a clear witness to the struggle within the Mormon Church.

However, the editors seem overly ambitious in their desire to provide both a volume of witnesses and resources. One book cannot contain everything about being gay. In an attempt to cover every issue, the editors end up skimming through serious material in the briefest of fashions. One article titled "A Therapist's Counsel for Married Homosexuals" offers slightly more than one page of advice. Such treatment is woefully inadequate. On the other hand, articles by noted scholars like James Nelson and Bishop John Spong provide the reader with valuable insight and current theological opinion.

Regardless of editorial shortcomings, Peculiar People provides substantial witness to the existence of gay and lesbian Mormons along with a challenge to the church to acknowledge its history of abuse. This is an historically important book giving voice to the wider struggle of spiritual people seeking to find acceptance, fulfillment, and a place of ministry within their faith community. There can be no tougher battle than that being waged within the Mormon church. Peculiar People is testimony to the voice of freedom which will not be silent.

The Event, David Pace
Mormons, engaged as they are in a patriarchal theocracy, do not have the option of petitioning their church hierarchy for much of anything, particularly when the issue involves sexuality. Peculiar People: Mormons and Same Sex Orientation (Signature, 1991, $24.95) is a long-needed petition of sorts, if not a gauntlet thrown down as a challenge to leaders of an organization that has condemned and often disciplined gays and lesbians. Just the book's existence, its presence on bookshelves and in Mormon homes, is a provocative text in itself.

The challenge is for the LDS Church to reexamine its response toward a condition represented by about ten percent of its population. This may not be the editor's overt purpose for marshalling the stories and opinions of Mormons and nonMormon lay persons and professionals, but in Mormonland, publishing a book or a periodical is the way "lobbying' for a cause is best initiated.

Going beyond the symbolic text, the book itself is quite the hodgepodge. Ron Schow, Wayne Schow and Marybeth Raynes aren't so much editors as they are circus masters who throw a loosely- organized outing and take whomever and whatever shows up. The result is a swath of material as wide as the Kinsey scale: from anonymous offerings to book excerpts; from activists and therapists to Protestant theologians and parents of gays and lesbians. The repetition of opinions and scenarios, especially in the first half titled, "Personal Voices," makes the effort seem hard sell and reactionary as a whole.

The pedestrian feel to the book is all the more unfortunate considering that individual essays in the first section are quite disarming, brimming with that distinctive, heartfelt Mormon impulse to unabashedly disclose the self. For example, Gordon Johnson relates, how, ironically, he was the organist during the infamous BYU "fireside" where LDS apostle Boyd K. Packer unequivocally condemned homosexuality for over an hour. Alluding to scripture, Mr. Johnson says, "As a gay person how can I fulfill the measure of my own unique creation? How can I live to the fullest that God has given me?"

This sense of longing for reconciliation and understanding with one's belief is a central, rhetorical ache in several of the featured voices—which are best read randomly as self-contained reports. Don D. Harryman, who has since left Mormonism, details how at BYU during the early 70s he was a participant in aversion (shock) therapy to rid him of his sexual orientation. Like Mr. Harryman, Linda May Peterson states in "I Love My Mormon Family," that she has also left her church. She insists, however, that even though Mormonism and lesbianism express irreconcilable differences, Mormons and lesbians do not. Still, says Ms. Peterson, the efforts at maintaining family ties remain strenuous, underscored with tense feelings for both parties.

Carol Lynn Pearson's account of her marriage to a gay man who eventually died of AIDS leads off the subsection titled "Partner's Voices." It is an excerpt typical of the dramatic and emotionally drenched prose of her book Goodbye, I Love You. Here too is an anonymous piece exploring a long-term relationship which, without a social mold, must be "worked out day by day, year by year." "There are very few givens," the author says, viewing such as a positive feature. That same-sex relationships can endure is a major point for those who are sensitive to the attacks of homosexuals as evidence that they are simply selfish and immoral.

Those patterns were what one man feared the most when his gay son decided to move from Utah to Los Angeles. In "A Father's Perspective," editor Wayne Schow poignantly describes, in one of the book's best pieces, how his son Brad (to whom the book is dedicated) became estranged, relocated away from the family; sought companionship in the hyper-lurid and dangerous gay lifestyle of Southern California only to eventually return home with the AIDS virus. Brad died shortly thereafter. The sentiment in the piece trembles with anger when Mr. Schow writes, "[Brad] had emerged from his teen years with his self-worth severely undermined. Our culture had encouraged him to hate himself, and the church's attitude toward homosexuality had contributed substantially to that despair." Perhaps, speculates Mr. Schow, alluding to a well-worn Mormon notion based on a premortal existence, individuals chose to be gay or lesbian for a holy, as yet unknown purpose. "He [Brad] was such a fine young man," he concludes. "At this point, we can say that we feel blessed to have had a son who was a homosexual."

As in the first half of Peculiar People, the second half is mostly a reader of previously published essays, but it features articles from professional and Christian perspectives. Sometimes the section reads like a treatise. For example, in James B. Nelson's "Religious and Moral Issues in Working with Homosexual Clients," Dr. Nelson, an ethics professor and ordained minister (non-Mormon), challenges traditional interpretations of Biblical scripture condemning homosexuals.

Other places in the section, however, read more like a how-to manual for gay and lesbian Mormons and their families and friends. The editors are clearly aware of the Mormon need for practical helps such as an anonymous doctor's exhaustive, science-based catalogue of gay "facts." To their credit, the editors are not only bent on showing that the many unanswered questions about same-sex orientation require cautious and compassionate responses, but that there are some things that we do know that can help alleviate pain and misunderstanding.

Despite some confusion then about the book's purpose, there are, once again, gems in the second half that resonate with the cultural hunger for discourse on the subject of homosexuality. The best of these is Marvin Rytting's. Here is a person who can deflect all the psychobabble and theologic posturing and cut to the chase. He is also the only one who writes in the book with any sense of humor. In "I Am Not A Good Egg," Mr. Rytting, professor of psychology at Purdue, helps us understand by conjuring up a fantasy, just what it means to be oriented in a particular sexual direction. What if homosexuality was the norm?, he asks. As a heterosexual, can you imaging trying to orient your desires and then behaviors toward the same gender? "I wonder how many [aversion] shocks it will take before I no longer get a charge from women," he asks hopelessly.

Better still, and more ambitious, is Mr. Rytting's second piece, "In Favor of Families," in which he challenges LDS marriage norms. To deny the blessing of marriage to people based on one demographic variable (gender), "irrespective of the merits of the relationship," he states, is "antifamily." Mr.Rytting's new profamily perspective overturns Mormonism's sacred touchstone, the traditional family as eternal, stating that, as practiced, it is glib, self-righteous and hypocritical. His suggestion is that, as with heterosexual couples, gay and lesbian individuals be encouraged to commit to a long-term relationship rather than cruise bars and bathrooms or be celibate, which isn't healthy (or "Mormon") either. He also suggests that the church and its members give these special pairings "toasters and blenders," as we do with more conventional couples.

Though not all contributors to the book agree that homosexuality cannot and should not be "cured," like Mr. Rytting's work, others accept sexual orientation as a given, and demonstrate a great deal of research and inventive presentation: Ron Schow and Marybeth Raynes' piece (Chapter 24) uses composite characters to illustrate the variety in adolescent gay and lesbian development. These essays and others like them clatter out of the volume with a kick that would inspire hope.

With Mormonism's unique, even radical, theology underscored by celestial sexuality and mankind's eternal progression, it is a puzzle that the church has not been able to approach the issue of homosexuality with more creativity and insight. Of all the official church statements on the issue listed in an appendix of the book, the LDS position is, embarrassingly, the most hard-line and curt. Undoubtedly, because of such a stance, Peculiar People, from its loaded, ironic title to its eclectic, sometimes clumsy selections, succeeds as a critical mass. It has detonated a discussion for those whose experience has differed from the pseudocommunity often characterized by mainstream Mormonism.